Resilient...

I have to laugh. I know, I know... I shouldn't. But I have to. I have attended a class for the last 5 Thursdays on what the Army defines as a resilient family member. I have attended all of the classes and they have now deemed me "equipped". I have to laugh because if I slowed down too long and really thought about why they are teaching me to be resilient I would have to cry.
I choose instead to laugh. I choose instead to hunt the good stuff and to be joyful no matter what the situation.
Drama, what drama? There was drama?
I guess what really keeps me moving is that I have survived so much more than people know. I am 'more than an overcomer'. I don't often give the gory details, but what the Army defines as resilient I define as 'overcomer'. So what exactly does that mean?
It doesn't mean that life is a bowl of cherries and that you never face challenges, or failure, or success. It doesn't mean that you have perfect kids, or a perfect marriage or dogs that never poop on the floor. It means that when you lose everything, you realize it was just stuff. When you lose someone you love, that you remember that God still has a purpose for your life. You plan for the worst and hope for the best. You don't take all of your anger, frustration, fear out on anyone near you. They can't handle it. They don't deserve it. God, whom doesn't deserve it, is the only one that can handle it. I remember many a time sitting in the Ingles parking lot overlooking our little town and yelling and crying to God to change my life. To deliver me. He did. Not in any way that I could have predicted or phathomed - did that prepare me for here? Maybe, but after the last couple of years of walking out the recovery of a life and dreams destroyed, I just value things differently. What used to be a HUGE deal, is now just common place. What used to kick me over the edge now just may cause a few tears. Do I always get it right? No. Are there days that I want to lay in bed and pull the covers over my head? Yes. And I do. Plenty of times.
Sometimes being resilient is knowing that I have permission to shut out the rest of the world. Resilient is being able to say no, being able to set and enforce comfortable boundaries.
This is all what resilient means to me, what does it mean to you?